The view from here right now is not this photo. This photo was taken a few weeks ago of a very grumpy but healthy Abbie. Grumpy because Mr F also bought me a bowl of grapes.
I told you Abbie doesn’t like to share food… Even when it’s not hers in the first place she can get her nose out of joint. One can’t help but laugh but unfortunately she also doesn’t take kindly to being laughed at. Cue more grumpy faces.
Abbie loves grapes so much that apparently ALL the grapes in the world are hers and even Mummy can’t have her own bowl…
Anyway the view from here at 5.30am as I write this is quite a different story. You wouldn’t want a picture. We look rough.
I’m sitting up in bed with a sleeping Abbie on my chest. We’ve mostly been like it since 10pm last night. I say mostly because while we’ve been sitting like this it hasn’t contained a lot of sleep. Especially for me.
It’s nights like this that remind you what a precious commodity life is!
Comforting my poor croopy baby and sponging her little body to help her fever, I find myself counting every single breath to make sure they’re all there.
Regularly she misses one and chokes a little struggling to breathe. And every time my heart and breath stops too!
I find myself counting the minutes until morning…. Until I can take her to the doctor and find out what exactly changed from yesterday morning when she was running around with her sister screaming in joy, to lying terrified in my arms choking her breathe. And terrifying me too!
I can’t stop thinking how lucky I am to be here though. Obviously not lucky to have a sick child! But lucky enough to be here being the one to snuggle her.
Lucky to know this kind of overwhelmingly protective love.
A mother’s love is something else isn’t it?
I’m so grateful I get to know that.
That is all…